Category: loneliness

Fantasy and reality

Fantasy and reality side by side grow

boundaries blur where is the plateau?

starkness of words translated into pictures

 holes in the substance, filled in, no glitches


Subconscious embellishment start a glow

bad habits, never witnessed, don’t spoil the show

endearments uttered are stored in memories box

 intense and  important, they become a paradox


She needs her emotions stirred, to feel a connection

his drivers very different, need inspection

married to other’s, they met playing a game

chatting and sharing life in a cyber domain


She’s desperate for love, her happiness compromised 

she grabs  affection and excitement, it makes her blind

he looks for  flirtation, moves through lusts revolving door

 enjoys the immediate journey, never requiring more


Intimacy inevitably grows with the sharing

 Could be great, if their perspectives were pairing

she loves that he calls her by that special name

unaware he calls, all other girls the same


He is wrapped up and interested, its no ploy

but soon he will be bored and move  to another  toy

her one in a million man will gradually pull away

Leaving her devastated  and crying at close of day

My home

Inside my bag are packed the things

that fill my heart with joy

the faded, threadbare shawl

that whispers 

a tinplate soldier toy.
Inside my bag wrapped well in cloth 

a tiny mirror fragment

immortalised inside that glass

the ghosts of those I love

Some memories are intransigent
Inside my bag stowed very safe

two  engraved silver napkin rings

a wooden bowl of cedar wood

an ebony black queen a

reminder of past sins

Inside my bag I have my home

memories, from days gone by

I lost the rest, I am alone

I will be till I die.
The hostel for the homeless 

Is where I rest my head

My bag stops my neurosis

My home sits under my bed. 

Yearning

As I search  the roads of this eternal maze

I just find dark corners and more dead ends 

Searching and searching  to ignite the blaze

With short term lovers or just good friends
Where is the love I am yearning towards

To worship my body and cherish my mind

The soul mate, lover, giver of rewards

The man to care for this heart in kind
 I know that  love is a two way process

Give in order to recieve: I understand

Love unrewarded  no forward progress

As I travel the maze on roads of sand
Hopeless it feels, a lovers touch I crave

Before I am called to the end, the grave.

Looking for you

I spent my life looking for you

Now I have found you,am happy but blue

It’s too late for you to be my mate

Wasted years, parlous state

Too many miles travelled

Too many locks to unravel

Could I be selfish and go with my heart

Whilst breaking many others,would just be the start

Now I stand on the precipice 

Looking back and forwards on the edge of bliss

Knowing that glimpse is my only prize

Now a life wedded to duty and fuelled by lies

I spent my life looking for you

Such a stupid thing to do! 

Facets of Christmas time

​A period of contrasts from sepia through to dazzling gold

A time of poignancy, reflection and joy

A religious celebration transposed into a season of gluttony and greed

A time of gift giving, family celebrations and gatherings

A time of arguements, marriage breakdowns and strife

A time of love, war and hate

Each facet sharpened because of the season

Poverty versus wealth

Loneliness versus family life

Love versus hate

Outlined in sharper contrast in a season of supposed joy

May the immutable values of Christmastime 

Remain through the year

Connection

​Connection

You walk beside me

Even though we are worlds apart

Connection
I have the pictures of you

Mind generated

Plus photographs sent over the ether

I have the pictures of you
Sharing with you

You are at the other end of my phone

Communication may be indirect but still

Sharing with you
Connection

Never feeling truly alone

An illusion that gives me strength

Connection

Drifting

​Words of love often suppressed

 Kindness taken for granted, unexpressed

Presumption of thoughts, norms and dreams

Seems we no longer talk of schemes

Drifting along feather light

Lack of communication lack of fight

Minds door closed 

How to rewind, do you suppose

Need to look and see the whole

Can we clean the windows, throw light on the soul

View the other objectively, eschew control

Or are doors locked tight, welded shut

Will we live our lives, forever stuck

Viewing each other from a place unexposed

Not pushing the gate for a loving repose

Words of love often unexpressed

Relationship sunk into mindlessness

Stemming the tide

​Rest, recuperation, renewal, regeneration

What do you need to heal the wounds

Put your life back on a firm foundation

Do you have a special place, bookmarked outside the rat race

Or a place within your mind

Where you stash any hurts until you can rewind

Sanity, surety, safety, success

What strategies do you have to cope

When life throws brick bats and you are feeling low

That anchor you, that give you hope 

Do you have a plan, or ride the storms in all their forms

If cast adrift

Where do you find the lift

Delve inside, find love, then strength to stem the tide.